World Famous Lizardman Battles Geckoman

   After more than a decade of separation, former college roommates and best friends Erik Sprague and Jordan Gecko have decided to meet up again. Apparently this will not be a friendly reunion. According to Mr. Peters, the time apart was due to an old grudge which he now wants to settle once and for all.
   The two attended Hartwick College in Oneonta, NY. Both studied philosophy and both became interested in challenging the ideas of what it is to be human. They both underwent major transformations.
   Mr. Sprague spent several years transforming his body though tatooing, piercing, and other body modifications such as Teflon horn implants and a bifurcated tongue (split tongue). He is now referred to as The Lizardman and makes his living as a performance artist.
   Mr. Gecko, on the other hand, tried to turn himself into a chicken. Realizing that stuffing eggs into his rectum was not the best of ideas he then tried to become an armadillo, a rabbit, a giraffe, an electric eel, and a pony. All attempts failed miserably and then one night, after some heavy drinking, he accidently hypnotized himself into believing he was an actual gecko. The spell was permanent. Years of psychotherapy have been spent to reverse the effects of the drunken night, but have only been mildly successful. Mr. Gecko now calls himself The Geckoman and makes his living selling bonds on wall street.
   The grudge the two have was apparently over a coffee mug. Geckoman claims that Lizardman stole his favorite unicorn painted coffee mug. Lizardman has said that this is a lie and added that his penis is bigger than Geckoman's penis.
   Manic World of Sports covers the long awaited stand-off. The winner leaves with the extremely gay unicorn coffee mug and bragging rights to having the biggest dick.

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